Handling my obsession with perfection
We live in a society which constantly tells us we are not good enough, but guess what? You are!
I never understood the fascination with wanting to be part of the system, or cookie cutter person. I was always different, unique or labeled eccentric. It started back when I was a kid, always drawing on my clothes, go to far off places in my imagination, my nose stuck in a book. While I thought these were all normal things others had different views about how I should live my life. .
Eventually I decided to block out the negative and reflect the positive.
A few years ago I went through one of my biggest transitions in life. I was in my last year of my twenties. It was a bitter sweet feeling, I didn't know wether to be sad, hopeful or both. I had finally made it to a point in my life where I was happy all around. I loved my simple art store job, living in the city and dreaming of places I wanted to visit. Yes I did have a beautiful independent life I was dealing with one major flaw, my obsession with perfection.
Perfection is the hardest habit to break...
For many of us we struggle with the need to feel super human, powerful, and for lack of a better word...perfect. We strive for the perfect bodies, perfect jobs, perfect household and the perfect attitude. This is how major companies get us, they feed off of that need. When true perfection comes from within. I was one of those people, I needed to find my happiness. To love myself for who I was and who I wanted to become.
We don't need to be a certain way to be who others want us to be.
I on my to a friends house when I heard Pink's song, F**kin' Perfect. I remember listening to the song and feeling the surge of emotions rush over me. How was this song doing this to me? As soon as I got home I had to watch the video. As I sat crying at my desk I knew what I had to do, I had to break my obsession with wanting to be perfect, because I already was.
Don't change for anyone but yourself
I felt so bad for this girl as she clearly was going through this situation blind. She was doing what most of us would do, tip toe around the obvious. I wanted to shout and scream how amazing she was, how unbelievably kind and beautiful. But I knew that she needed to find that herself. No one wants to get hurt, especially by those we care about. But why do try and change to make them happy. Love and happiness should not be conditional.
We justify peoples actions to reassure ourselves.
It's ok, we've all done it. Trust me after one of my failed relationships I cried through the entire book, He's just not that into you. I felt as if everyone was talking to me. I learned that if someone really wants to be in your life, they will step up to that plate (this goes for both relationships and friendships). We often settle because we are lonely or not happy with ourselves. But happiness is within us, and once we find it we rise out of our own ashes and bust forth as a phoenix.
What to do when you feel less than perfect
- stop listening to others opinions before your own
- write down all the ways you love yourself
- Pause, rest and regain
- read your favorite book
- take a bubble bath
- start a gratitude journal
- talk to your friends
- go on a self date
- create a vision board
- treat yourself to ice cream
- make a positive and empowerment playlist
- give yourself credit
- speak your truth even if it hurts
- don't change to make someone else happy
- trust in positive change directed towards your better being
- help another brighten their day
- write down all your imperfections and rewrite them as all the things you love about yourself
- do something fun for yourself
- just do you