This weekend my dear friend Tara, was having her baby shower in Wisconsin. When I received the invitation there wasn't a doubt as to whether I was going. Even our friend Shelly and her boyfriend were planning to go. So we decided to make the trip together.
The month leading up to the shower was super hard. Keeping a secret from her is soooooo hard. Beating around the bush with questions so I would know what to pack. By the time this past Friday showed up I was beyond ready. Plus I not only was going to see my friends but I was also going to see snow....and a real winter.
We arrived in Chicago Friday evening, getting blasted by the wind while we waited for the shuttle. We picked up our car and drove the two hours to Madison,WI. The whole where there Shelly and I gasped, awed and commented on every bit of snow we saw. This was going to be a taste of something similar to what I will be experiencing the end of this year. I was ecstatic to give it a go. We arrived in Madison, ran to the store and excitedly settled into our hotel. Sleep did not come easy that night.
Saturday morning I was on pins and needles. The trip had remained a secret so far and we had just a little bit to go. The hotel we were staying at was just a few miles from our friend's house. So the entire ride to the restaurant Shelly and I played peek a boo with the passing cars. Laughing at our stealth like attempt at holding our arm in front of our faces.
We got to the restaurant and was snuck in by Tara's sister. The look on her face was worth every second. It was so good to see her and her boyfriend. And I got to "meet" the wee one. There were plenty of tears, hugs and laughs. The shower was super cute and very fun. We played unconventional baby shower games and ate delicious food.
The rest of the weekend was spent catching up, seeing the baby kick, pizza, comedy shows, and getting to check off a bucket list item. If you're following me on Instagram, you saw that I was able to stand on Lake Monona. This was something that I just can't stop geeking out about the trip. My friends took me to stand on a frozen lake, How cool is that?
All in all I have realized this past weekend that the little things we do for our friends, surprising them, taking them somewhere unique, and even sending them a card. The little things mean so much. I am so grateful to have gotten to enjoy that moment with my friends.. This weekend was definitely a great one. I don't even mind the travel hangover.
I have been holding out for so long. Clenching my tongue against my teeth in order to keep the status quo flowing. I am one of those easy going chicks that likes to speak her mind but also likes to keep the peace. That was until this past year. I have finally become fed up with keeping quiet. With everything going on in our world now is not the time to be silent. People are losing rights, dying, fighting, vandalizing. There are riots in our streets and our energy is being reverberated across the globe. This weekend almost 3million women marched to stand up for our rights as women. I feel awed and inspired by these women. As I have been my whole life. I always enjoyed reading about women who fought to be heard. Now it's our time!
All joking and expectations aside, the reality is that we now have a celebrity as a president. I have had my issues with this long before our election but if I must I must. The truth is no matter how I feel, and I feel pretty strongly, he is now sitting in that chair for the next four years.. So as an American I look at it as accepting you to show me what you can do. But as a woman, a fighter, a lover, a peaceful warrior, a friend, a sister, a daughter, a person with a voice...get ready to hear me roar.
Ladies now is the time to stand up, now is the time to show the country what we are made of. Start standing up for yourself. Start showing the people who put you down that you are ready to fight. Look back throughout history, look back at all the women who have fought for us. Everything came at a price. We wouldn't have gained so much without great loss. This is our chance to award ourselves another monuments moment in history. Look at all we have accomplished just in the last five years. Keep going! Imagine what we can accomplish in the next five!
Now is the time to start letting your roar out. You want something go for it. You deserve that promotion, you deserve the career change, the business ownership, the motherhood, the wife, friend, activist and any other title you want to test to you name. The road a head is going to be hard with many, many obstacles and challenges along the way. But nothing dreamt ever came easy, so get ready to fight. Put on your armor, you're strong enough, and step out the door. There are many who are waiting for your voice. Help others and share in the hope that together we can achieve anything. Stand up for those who can not stand up for themselves. And most importantly, don't ever let anyone tell you that you are anything less than amazing.
Love and Hugs!
Happy Monday everyone!
I write this post through water filled eyes. I am not crying because I am sad, in fact I am crying for just the opposite. With everything that has happened the past few days the entire world is up in arms. It seems as if everywhere I turn hatred is being spread so thickly it seems as if it will never clean up. Tonight I as was scrolling through my Fb feed I came across a beautiful video about a man and his wife. He was telling the nurse how much he loved his wife and that they had been together for 70 years. He went on to talk about how he didn't want to waste time with his heart condition, his wife was in stage one of Alzheimers and he wanted to spend every moment he could with her. He said that he was incredibly grateful to have this woman in his life and he needed to be there for her while she slowly gave way to the disease. Can we say oceans pouring from my eyes? Goodness gracious.
This was immediately followed by yet another amazing video. Oh my heart! The next one I watched was a 6min clip filled with all the ways humanity has shown love. Kids being kind to those less fortunate, adults helping one another, sacrifices and paying it forward. By the end of these two videos I just let my tears fall down my cheeks. It showed me that there are amazingly kind acts people do every second of the day. When we focus on all the bad things people do it is as if we put blinders on our hearts. Good is out there, love is out there. We must all do our part to help spread more love.
I know it's hard. I completely understand how easy it can be pointing out every little thing that went wrong in one day. I completely empathize with wanting to place blame and point the finger. I live and work in one of the most judgmental and entitled city atmospheres. Well for a few more months any way. But we mustn't let the misery of others drag us down. I know it can be hard in the moment, but try at some point to see things from the other person's view. Maybe it's the way they were brought up, maybe they hate their lives and just don't care anymore, and maybe they sadly are just shallow people. I promise you they aren't everyone.
For the next few days I am going to take into account every time someone pays it forward, compliments me, or I witness an act of love. I want to start focusing on the good in people again. I want to show others that love is a powerful force. If we all just show a little bit of love towards others whole new doors open up.
Love and hugs everyone!
P.s. Hate is easy, veto takes courage. Are you brave enough?
Being stuck and starting over multiple times
Have you ever felt as if you are always starting over? Do you ponder the thought that you just have bad luck? I get it. I have often thought that my self. One of my favorite sections to browse through has always been the "self-help" area. I have always been inspired by others that have gone through similar situations. When I was in my twenties I felt as if I loved in that section of the book store. I felt as if the world was out to get me every time I placed my foot out the door. It was as if I couldn't get a grasp on my life. If it wasn't my relationships it was my job, if it wasn't school it was friends, so on and so forth. So what changed? When did I get to a point where getting myself out of the woods wasn't as hard as I thought?
When things go haywire we feel as if we are lost in the deepest, darkest parts of the forest. I can remember the a ha moment when I gave my self permission to start over multiple times. I was turning 30 and leaving my young adult hood behind. I remember thinking of how different I was going to be and how much growth I was going to have. Even if it was overnight. Let me tell you, I was sooooooo wrong. So far the past three years of my 30's has been a rollercoaster ride of holy shit. The only difference is my reactions and attitudes have gotten more chill.
I realized the past few years that I was always going to have times where I am going to be "stuck", in my life. I decided that it was all part of building new chapters in my life. Being stuck just means we have come to a turning point in our lives. I can look back the past 12 years and see every single time I was "stuck" something amazing came afterwards. The more times you are stuck the more times you are growing. It is a time of planning, releasing, and growth. It is a time to move forward and show yourself how strong you are. It is the chance to be your own hero. Progress does not come easy. To get to where you are going you will always have obstacles in your way. You will always have a period of time where you feel completely hopeless. It is hard to keep your faith when your heart is broken, you have no money or you don't want to be where you are. But it is at these very moments we can find the most clarity.
You are a warrior!
When we are at our low points we often have the chance to work through the bs of our behaviors and actions. Being able to hold our selfs accountable takes great strength. It takes a lot of courage to push through and begin anew. Look back on all the times you thought you wouldn't make it and see how far you have come. Being a warrior doesn't mean you don't cry or you don't have a heart. In fact it is just the opposite. Some of the strongest people in history have fought battles with tears in their eyes. I look at struggles as opportunities to prove to myself that I can make it through the storm. I may fall a part, I may cuss and scream, but I won't back down from a chance to show my worth. I know that my Goddess shows me challenges so that I can gain another step on my path.
When you feel stuck spend some time assessing the situation. Work through the painful emotions and honor how you feel. Don't feel guilty for eating that ice cream and watching yet another chick flick on netflix. It is a process. Remember it is not a bad life just a bad day, (month, week, etc). The important thing is that we must always be grateful for the things that we do have. Air, shelter, food, friends, family,, our bodies, our hearts, etc. Don't worry if someone tells you to get over something. Don't listen to someone if they are passing judgement on what job you have. If it is paying your bills and affording you to reach for you goals...get it! You have to do what you need to, so that you can survive and grow.
Overtime you will start to understand that starting over is one of the greatest things in the world. It is that second chance at a new perspective. It is a second chance at a new chapter in your life. look at it as a time to let go of something that no longer works for you and a chance to find the thing that does. You can make your life amazing with only a little bit of courage, kindness, and willingness to let go. Don't force yourself to move on, instead work through your struggle to come out the other side. Fight your way through the woods.
Ways to get through a "stuck" phase
Are you living or just getting by? Are you creating adventure in your life? What big adventures are you planning for 2017? Let me know in the comments below. 😊💖😊
The magic of this 30 something life
"Wild hearts can not be tamed, controlled, or ever really be broken. Wild hearts can only be made stronger, love harder and gain the confidence it needs to be free."
A few years ago if you were to ask where I thought I would be in my thirties, I would have never have thought It would be where I am today. When I was younger I always saw myself in two situations; I was either married or living an extremely extravagant single life. It really depended on the mood I was in when asked. I was also a wild hearted person, from a very young age I knew I was different. Never sticking to the norm or societies expectations. Not saying that it didn't give me grief for not fitting in, but it did give me strength in many more ways than one would think. So sitting here, almost 2weeks till I turn 33 and remebering one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies, "wild hearts can't be broken."
The meaning behind the quote is one of deep and powerful comitment of loving one's se;f. Being wild hearted is a long road of obstacles, heart break, success and great determination. Not saying that those who don't have wild hearts are weak, not at all. Wild hearts come in many shapes and sizes. Some join the circus while others travel the world tasting coffee. Having a wild heart is something that is completely unique to the individual. But more on that in a bit.
If you have been following my story the past year you noticed, just like many others, 2016 was a year of great loss and transformation for me. in the next couple of weeks I will be turning 33 and I am looking at it with great possibility. The begining of my thirties I almost always felt as if I were climbing up hill. I was always in some sort of struggle, either with my career, purpose, love life or just plain loving myself. The past few years I have dealt with a great deal of baggage, past issues and growth. All things that I can look back and now I finally see the benefit in going through all of these things. While 2016 felt as if it was just a basket of shit being carried around, dropping on us from above. With this new year we have to look back and see the positive outcomes that helped us push forward.
When looking back the first thing you must always remember, look at your past with kind and compassionate eyes. I myself have laid awake at 3am thinking of my past mistakes. Trust me it still happens. I mean who really cares about being what you did when you were 18. Does it really matter that you messed up? No. The only thing that matters is that you look at the situation, see the parts where you were at fault, and begin to forgive yourself. I have been selfish, spoiled, greedy and did some pretty unsavory things in my youth. But dwelling over our wrong doings will never get us anywhere. Instead we must look back and see what changes these actions caused. Look back be accountable and then forgive yourself as well as others.
The magic of being in your thirties is that you are able to move forward much faster. You start to realize that your life is your own. The views, opinions and judgement of others hurts less and heals fast. You are able to take solace in the lessons that are brought to you. One of the best things about learning from your mistakes is the fact that you can finally start to look back and see how far you have come. This finally leads me to being wild at heart and being comfortable in the life that I have.
As I said earlier, I have always had a wild heart. I was never really good at being told what to do, being controlled or someone trying to tame me. No matter how hard I tried, I never really fit in with any groups. And as much as I hate to admit it used to drive me crazy. I always wanted to try new things, be the first to impulsively jump, or yearning for the next adventure. Challenges never scared me, even if I cried I still will stand my ground. Wild hearts learn to love themselves through hardships and determination. But keep in mind that being a wild heart can also have it's set of self destructive side effects.
Sometimes wild hearts learn to buid walls, battle with ocd and can be controlling in nature. We often grow up very independent which can lead to wanting things to go our way. We must all learn to accept both our light and our dark sides. The good and bad qualities we have. That is just part of growing as a person. That is one of the best things about entering your thirties, you start to understand the purpose of your life. And always remember that a purpose, no matter how big our small, is still a purpose. So never let anyone make you feel less for your dreams. You have every right to be where you are, in what ever stage of life, and have your reasons why.
Things I love about my thirties:
<3 Being single
<3 Creating my personal space
<3 Gaining confidence I never knew I had
<3 Growing from lessons and mistakes
<3 Doing what I want, when I want, without the guilt
<3 Letting go of that which does not work for me
<3 Pushing through obstacles and staying positive after the outcome
<3 Seeing opportunities and grabbing them
<3 Knowing exactly what I want and making plans to achieve it
<3 Spending time with those that truly care for my wellbeing and progress
<3 Telling my loved ones how I feel
<3 Having lazy Sundays and sleep in Saturdays
<3 Being as lazy or productive as I want
<3 Creating a timeline that works for myself
<3 Living my life for myself
<3 Learning to love myself unconditionally
Retrograde is in an unique situation. It began December 19th and will end January 8th. Talk about starting wtih a new clean state. Mercury going in retrograde helps us to look inward, causing us some major transformation. It also effects things like communication, energy, rational thinking, transportation and technology. Has it felt as if poeple are going crazy? You can't complete sentences? How about feeling tired and irritable? Mercury in retograde sounds a lot like pms doesn't it.
But it doesn't have to be all bad. While retrograde can make you want to hibernate, this can be the universe telling you to take it easy. It can be a time to get some much needed rest and feel refreshed. This is also a time where we can take a step back and view our lives objectively. Are you living or just getting by? Are you headed in the direction of your dreams or are you passing time in fear? These are all great things to work on during retrograde. But remember be gentle with yourself. Don't compare, judge, or let your ego take over the show.
Easy ways to work through retrograde: