We fear rejection, get rewarded for poor behavior, fear judgement of how we look and act, and the worst part is is causes us to judge ourselves. When I was in my twenties I would spend hours putting on fake photo shoots. I would dress in different outfits, change makeup, and even have sets put up. At the time I was extremely insecure and desperate for reassurance. I became obsessed with the attention. This was when social media was still pretty but I would post these pictures up and constant check my stats. I wanted to to see how many viewed them, liked them and commented. I walked around with fear, guilt and envy. I would jealously look at other women and compare myself to them. It wasn't a good time in my life. But over time I learned where I needed to grow and heal.
We become concerned with what others think because we lack the love within ourselves. We lost track of what is truly important to our hearts. If you think you are enough for someone it's because you believe you aren't enough for someone. This is the is why I said there can be a dark side to that instant gratification lifestyle. Don't get me wrong if you follow me on instagram you know I post selfies all the time. Infant I encourage you to take as many selfies as you can. But do it in the light of shining from within. Show your happiness, show your inner light. Post without expectations of what others think. Dare to take a no pose, no filter, no make selfie and see how you feel.
Grab your journal, notebook or piece of paper. Answer these next few questions truthfully. (even if it makes you cringe)
- In what ways do you care how others feel and think about you?
- What are some of the unhealthy ways you use social media?
- Post a selfie: How do you feel when /preparing/taking the photo? How do you feel after? How do you feel when you get likes? Did you have expectations? How did you feel after 24hours?
- How do you feel when someone says something negative towards you?
- How do you feel when someone judges you?
- In what ways do you feel rejected?
- Do you love your self? Really and truly love yourself.
- Does the opinions of others play action to your decision making?
- How do you face obstacles?
- What would you do if you weren't afraid? Afraid of guilt, regret, judgement, funds, etc...